Friday, January 18, 2008

Now What?

For the first time in a very long time, I find myself unemployed and at loose ends with no particular destination in mind. Aside from the sadness of leaving something that has absorbed my life for many years, I find myself feeling rather empty - peaceful, but empty. Not since I graduated from college without a plan for my future have felt quite this directionless. That isn't a bad thing just not comfortable.

Thankfully, in middle age I have more sense than to rush in to doing something, anything to avoid the stillness of being home with my own thoughts. I'm reading lots of books, a combination of brain candy and thought provoking self help. I'm taking time to put my physical house in order, which is a shock to all of its occupants and thinking about walking again. I am allowing myself time to cry, laugh, complain, curse and anything else that feels right.

It is a start to what will probably be a long journey. I like to travel so it is time to be one my way.

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