Knitting progress

This knitting thing really can be addictive.  I started a wrap for my daughter-in-law which is a lovely blue and lacy.  Getting started was a challenge because I kept losing my place on the lace row and having to rip out.  Once I got past that point it actually started taking shape and I can see that eventually it will be beautiful.  

The problem is that I keep working on my knitting instead of all the other things I should be doing like a business plan and taxes.  It is so much more rewarding to work on something I can see results from.  It also gives me a good excuse not to exercise since I'm not nearly good enough at knitting yet to walk and knit at the same time.  I'm not sure my coordination would ever be that good!  Consequently my ass is spreading out of my jeans which is not a good look for me.

Did I mention that it is getting hot here now?  Summer starts in March and doesn't end until Thanksgiving so I'm already avoiding physical activity in the daylight hours.  That doesn't help the posterior spread either.  

Oh well, I'll think about that another day.  I think my burgandy cherry ice cream is calling followed by some more knitting.  Tomorrow is plenty soon to start that whole diet and exercise thing.

Life is good (at least for today)

I've now been off of work almost three months and am trying to decide whether I really want to start again. If it weren't for that retirement thing looming ahead of me, I could get used to fixing up my house, reading, sitting with the cats, playing on the computer and just generally being relaxed. I even have started knitting again after many years and finished a few projects. Of course that inspired me to buy more yarn than I can use this year. I'm afraid I've started another collection, which is the last thing my poor overstuffed house needs.

On the bright side, my painting is done except for a couple of window sills and touchups! It looks great and now I don't have to feel guilty about painting for another twenty years. I got my new carpet and no longer have to worry about the smell of dog pee infusing the room when it gets humid. That damn dog saturated the pad to the point it was beyond hope. The fact that the dog has been dead for 3 years and I just got the carpet replaced is testimony to how psycho busy I was keeping myself working for people who didn't appreciate my efforts. Once the new blinds get in the front of my house will look almost presentable. Of course now the tile and furniture look pretty sad, but that will have to wait for when I have money coming in again.

I am still investigating the possibility of starting my own business as a consultant since there aren't really any jobs out there other than Walmart or Burger King. I alternate between excitement and sheer terror but at least I'm not bored! Thank goodness for my loving hubby who is keeping the bills paid while I find myself (though he is expecting me to knit him something soon)

My cats and family love me, my house no longer looks like an annex of the city dump and I'm actually living instead of just surviving. Life is good!

I've got the painting blues

I sit here on the couch trying to avoid the ceiling. I know it is up there waiting for a second coat of paint but maybe if I don't look I can pretend I don't need to get up off my fat butt and pick up the roller. I haven't painted this particular room in 20 years and never the ceiling. I started with great intentions and excitement when I bought the paint it took me 6 months to pick out. After 4 hours of prepping the room I remembered why I don't like to paint. It isn't so much the actual slapping new paint on to flat surfaces that bothers me, it is all the taping and spackling and covering that must be done first.

My other challenge is my overweight, out of shape body that is complaining about trips up the ladder and rolling out a ceiling while looking up. I know they tell you an extension pole makes things easier but it also makes my right shoulder tighten up like a rock. Today plan is to alternate ladder and rolling to give my screaming muscles a break. Perhaps by the time I work through two more ceilings and 3 rooms of walls I'll be reasonably competent and less sore.

Oh well, off my ass and on to work.

Now What?

For the first time in a very long time, I find myself unemployed and at loose ends with no particular destination in mind. Aside from the sadness of leaving something that has absorbed my life for many years, I find myself feeling rather empty - peaceful, but empty. Not since I graduated from college without a plan for my future have felt quite this directionless. That isn't a bad thing just not comfortable.

Thankfully, in middle age I have more sense than to rush in to doing something, anything to avoid the stillness of being home with my own thoughts. I'm reading lots of books, a combination of brain candy and thought provoking self help. I'm taking time to put my physical house in order, which is a shock to all of its occupants and thinking about walking again. I am allowing myself time to cry, laugh, complain, curse and anything else that feels right.

It is a start to what will probably be a long journey. I like to travel so it is time to be one my way.

A Wish for some Holiday Spirit

I used to love Christmas. At least I did until it was my responsibility to make it happen. My mother was a true Christmas lover and I learned from a young age to adore the lights, packages and wonderful smells that came out of the kitchen. As I got older Christmas lost a bit of its shine but then I was getting married and creating my own traditions. My husband has always thought I was a little nuts about Christmas but was patient even in those years when our house was decorated like a gift shop.

When my children were young I both loved and hated Christmas. I was a stay at home mom for long enough that my family got used to me making Christmas a big production. Some days I enjoyed it other days I was so exhausted I could hardly see straight. Christmas took on a life of its own that consumed many hours until I returned to work full time.

I loved my job but it quickly became apparent to me (if not to my family) that something had to give. The first year I tried not to have anything change and came away from the season resentful. By the next year I had a wonderful book called Unplug the Christmas Machine and was ready to try something new. I sat the family down and told them I couldn't continue to be supermom and needed their help in deciding what Christmas traditions we were going to keep and which would go.

Of course the outcry was deafening. No a thing must change - of course they would help. I held firm and asked each person to identify one food and one tradition that absolutely defined Christmas for them. I've never been able to pare Christmas down quite that much but was able to make it more manageable. I actually started enjoying some of the holiday again.

The holidays have continued to be a struggle for me since then. I still love the Christmas tree (though I opted for a fake tree this year for the first time since none of the kids will be here).
I love Christmas music and goodies if someone else is making them. My decorations sit in closets with only the minimum put out. Of course the fact that I would have to use dynamite on my house to get it clean enough to decorate might have something to do with that.

Perhaps the biggest hurdle to holiday happiness the last few years has been my job. December has become one of the busiest months of the year with many pressures and little time for holiday joy. I get caught in the pull between wanting to be home and needing to be taking care of business. Mostly I decide I just want the holidays over so I don't have to deal with extra demands on my time.

Now that I have that out of my system perhaps I can enjoy the day and take a little time for a cup of holiday tea and get the tree out of the box. At least that is a start.

Nothing better to do

1. Name one person who made you laugh last night? My daughter and her roommates - they are always entertaining

2.What were you doing at 0800? Sleeping - what sane person wouldn't be on a weekend?

3. What were you doing 30 minutes ago? Eating dinner and surfing the net

4. What happened to you in 2006? Who can remember that long ago?

5. What was the last thing you said out loud? Pizza's here

6. How many beverages did you have today? At least 5

7. What color is your hairbrush? Don't own one - I use a hair pick

8. What was the last thing you paid for? Previously mentioned pizza

9. Where were you last night? In Phoenix at the John Prine concert - it was awesome

10 What color is your front door? Brown

11. Where do you keep your change? Everywhere - purse, kitchen drawer, desk drawer, counter. . .

12.What’s the weather like today? Warm and slightly cloudy

13. What’s the best ice-cream flavor? Anything with chocolate

14. What excites you? New books, seeing my family, reaching a goal

15. Do you want to cut your hair? Just did as it is fairly short

16. Are you over the age of 25? I don't want to even discuss this

17. Do you talk a lot? Yes, at times.

19. Do you know anyone named Steven? Yes, he's rehabbing in Phoenix from a broken neck which has left him paralyzed from the shoulders down. It really sucks at 24.

20. Do you make up your own words? No, but many family members do

21. Are you a jealous person? Not usually but the green monster has appeared in the past

22. Name a friend whose name starts with the letter ‘A’. I don't have any 'A' friends.

23. Name a friend whose name starts with the letter ‘K’. Kathe - college best friend, maid of honor, great lady

24. Who’s the first person on your received call list? Probably my daughter Nicole

25. What does the last text message you received say? I don't text so it has been over a year.

26. Do you chew on your straw? Yes, and pens also

27. Do you have curly hair? Depends on how humid it is how curly it is

28. Where’s the next place you’re going to? California for Thanksgiving

29. Who’s the rudest person in your life? Don't want to go there - the negative energy might overwhelm me

30. What was the last thing you ate? Again pizza

31. Will you get married in the future? Hopefully I'll stay with just the current one

32. What’s the best movie you’ve seen in the past 2 weeks? Haven't seen anything new

33. Is there anyone you like right now? My hubbie

36. Did you cry today? Nope - not a crying kind of day

37. Why did you answer and post this? So I don't have to do anything else

Another week

I guess I'm not very good at this blogging thing as I can go many days without saying anything. I don't have the ability to ramble for half a page and be witty while doing it which may explain why I'm writing to myself. After a week of phone calls, hours on the internet and much consultation with various schedules, arrangements were made for Thanksgiving. It is going to cost a fortune and some of us will only be there for a day or so but at least we'll be in the same place for the family holiday.